Learn serenity: 7 tips for balance

Serenity can be trained

Stress is an all-encompassing emotion that each of us views and experiences from a different perspective. Whether at work, struggling to meet your own and your family's expectations, and especially in relationships. You know best when you are experiencing stress. In doing so, you will likely, like most others, block out the stress and move on.

You can understand existing and upcoming stress and take steps to respond in serenity. Because your own reaction in stressful situations is unique. No other person reacts one-to-one the way you do.

Are you aware of yourself and your individual tensions and concerns? We all go through times that are more challenging and stressful. That's exactly why it's important to develop your own technique for strengthening your self-rest.


Gelassenheit lässt sich lernen und trainieren. Auf dem Bild ist eine junge Frau zu sehen, die auf dem Sofa Kaffe trinkt und gemütlich ein Buch dazu liest. Sie ist Ausgeglichen

What does serenity mean?

Maintaining inner calm and the inner attitude to keep one's composure even in the most difficult situations. Unbiased in a relaxed attitude.

Serenity in everyday life does not mean to walk through the world with a smile on your face all day long and to affirm everything. Nor does it mean reacting indifferently to challenges.

Serenity is the opposite of restlessness, tension, nervousness and stress.


What does serenity look like in everyday life?

You will certainly be familiar with the drive to work where you can't outrun the slowpokes or the truck in front of you to get to work on time or quickly. An easy-going person thinks to themselves "Ahh, then I can listen to two or three more songs before my work day begins."

Excitement is not worth it in many cases. This realization is the foundation of serenity. Something that has happened cannot undo the excitement. Often we react to trifles to a far too great extent, harming ourselves or even those around us. When we react calmly, we offer ourselves many more possibilities in our actions. For example, we can think about actions and apply specific necessary steps. As a result, we use less energy than when we act emotionally or without thinking. A big plus for health and quality of life.


Advantages of composure

  • Constructive handling of stress, criticism, attacks or rejection
  • Stress reduction
  • Experience is sought in setbacks
  • Easier communication through inner security
  • Improve social relationships
  • Remaining oneself
  • External influences take less influence
  • Enjoyment of life



There are different ways to achieve serenity. We will show you some ways:


Learn relaxation techniques

Relaxation exercises can be done almost anywhere and reduce inner tensions. A distinction is made between active and passive relaxation techniques. What pleases and helps one person will not necessarily please and help another. There are numerous ways and techniques to come to rest.

Passive relaxation techniques include all actions in which the relaxant relaxes:

  • Massages
  • Sauna sessions
  • Sleeping
  • Listening to music
  • Reading
  • A hot bath


Active relaxation exercises include actions in which the relaxer, on the other hand, actively contributes something to relaxation:

  • Going for a walk
  • Exercising
  • Breathing exercises
  • Meditating
  • Imagination
  • Doing something that gives pleasure


It is important to take time for rest and relaxation on a regular basis. Too often, relaxation comes up short because of the argument "I don't have time for it." If your body is relaxed, your mind will follow suit. Is there something here that brings you relaxation?



Decide consciously

Your actions are in your hands. You can consciously decide for or against something. You can take something into your life, but also remove something from your life. You can allow yourself serenity. It is the most important decision to serenity.


People hold on to anger and resentment

What makes us hold on to negative feelings? It's habits and routines that we follow. How we grew up, how we were taught to act and our own experiences are reasons of the natural way of dealing with situations and our feelings. Also the decision to deal with feelings the way we do is a habit, possibly acted in for a long time.

Our brain assigns an emotion to every piece of information. The solution is to identify what pattern the emotions follow. When this is broken down and attention is paid to the body's signals, the cycle can be broken. We find new ways out of old habits to deal with situations and feelings.


You can consciously choose a positive attitude

Because often it is our attitude and beliefs that stand between us and who we are and want to be. It is our mind that sets our boundaries. Learn to expand your awareness of yourself, your actions and beliefs, and expand your possibilities and perspectives in and on life.

In choosing to be positive, it may be natural to also choose to be solution-oriented. Instead of allowing yourself to become overwhelmed, solution-focused looking at your options will help you find a solution.



Understand stress, its origin and improve your handling of this challenger

We have created a course on managing stress and dealing with negative emotions. You can read through different lessons to reflect on your actions, understand your stress, transform it and make decisions for the future. The content for the "Dealing with negative emotions" part is structured identically. Here you will find an excerpt from the part on dealing with negative emotions. Lesson 3 - Reshape:

What can you do with your negative emotions? Is it right to ignore your emotions and thus block them out? Have you had any insight into dealing with these emotions before? Here you will get ways to get some insight.


1. Negative emotions are a warning sign that is often a false alarm. As soon as these emotions arise, you can ask yourself the following questions:

Am I in danger? Am I angry? Am I being treated unjustly?

You can look for the why behind this alarm. If you decide to do this, focus your attention on the situation. Do you really need to act? Can you just let things take their course instead? Does any action need to be taken?


Zwei Menschen sind zu sehen. Der eine reagiert bei einem Fehlalarm mit Gelassenheit während die andere Person nervös wird


Personal tip: The following question has always helped me:

How important is all of this a month from now? Unimportant? Then this situation is not worth tarnishing my beautiful day for a moment. I probably won't even have to act and the situation will resolve itself.

At the same time, I find it very interesting to question the why in the opposite person's action. All by myself. It helps me to better understand the interpersonal relationship, but also the person. If this person is repeatedly a trigger for negative emotions, I can take measures to make it easier to deal with this person and the situations that arise.

Through this, you can understand what is happening right at that moment. When you become aware of a situation, you can also act consciously and not let the emotions have power over your actions.


2. Is the emotion driven by fear? Am I really in danger? Or is it fear that I will not get the reaction from a person that I expected?

There are fears that are worth focusing your attention on. There are also fears that are not worth it. What will happen in the worst case and will it affect your entire life?

Many people make decisions when they are driven by fear. These decisions may turn out to be inappropriate in hindsight. Fear is necessary in order to grow. It takes you out of your comfort zone and pushes you to make progress. However, this only works if you are willing to experience and stimulate emotional experiences. This is the level of feelings. The level of thoughts helps you to understand yourself better, to think better, to plan better and to decide more consciously and to reflect your values in your decisions.

Does this small excerpt already help you? What about a personal tip? Do you have your own or similar methods?




Keep an overview

It is important to keep the overview. If you keep the overview, you will react more relaxed on detours and new challenges. You can find or think of ways to keep the overview.

Write everything down and go over your notes. Set three tasks every day that you want to accomplish no matter what. This will give you

  • Focus
  • Overview
  • A clear head

It's often the simple things that are so obvious and easy that lead us to our goals. But they still get forgotten. If you need some guidance or a template, you can find our Success Journal and Vision Book here.



Get enough sleep

We spend a large portion of our lives sleeping. However, sleep is a different priority for each of us. Lack of sleep leads to lack of focus, listlessness and irritability. Medical experts recommend 7-8 hours of sleep. Balanced sleep, on the other hand, brings many benefits:

  • Regenerates body and mind
  • Increases happiness
  • Reduces the risk of diseases
  • Strengthens our defenses
  • Improves attention, motivation, concentration, creativity



Social contacts

When you struggle alone with problems or fears, the danger is that they will seem bigger and bigger. Talk to friends or family members about your concerns. It relaxes you and helps you to have a clear perception. You check your perceptions and can determine if you think harmless things are bad.



Be accepting

If you are able to see mistakes as normal and they are part of life, you are already contributing greatly to serenity. Mistakes happen whether we get upset or not. Whether we want to avoid them or not. By accepting and tolerating mistakes, we can be patient with them.

Also remember: Your reality is not necessarily the other person's reality. Be aware that each of us experiences the world through our own eyes. You will not know the reason behind many of the actions of those around you. Of course, you don't have to put up with everything. But it's not worth getting into trouble if you don't even know the reasons. Often the nature of the action towards us does not always have anything to do with us directly. Actions of our fellow human beings often lead back to situations or conflicts in which fellow human beings find themselves.




We humans often follow thought patterns, habits and routines. If you choose serenity, you can make it a habit to incorporate it into your life and everyday life. Serenity is much more than just ease. It helps us respond appropriately to encounters and challenges in our daily lives.

Ibo from Rising Life Books

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